This blog is cooler than evah befoe...
And the Decemberists are awwwwwwesome.

Post No. 100.

Dedicated to Google - Saviour of the In'duh'viduals

My two cents...

I know this blog is dead. In fact it's way past its death, multiple re-incarnations, some subsequent deaths, burials...basically been through everything remotely related to all that life-n-death crap...and is finally in a state of limbo.
And that, actually, makes writing here all the more worthwhile. Firstly, you don't expect any response whatsoever. Secondly....umm, well there isn't anything worthier to do on a as-bluesy-as-it-gets monday morning, when ur manager's on leave, and the work can, well, (to put it easy) can be overlooked.
So.
After all this mindless thought which used to be the very essence of this blog, comes the question i've dreaded for the entire 5 mins. I've spent writing this: what to write about in the first place!?
...
...
Arrr, what the heck, I might as well write about the damn weekend yet again. At least saturday ('cause sunday was spent healing my aging muscles who had to bear the brunt of the physical and mental stresses I'd been subjected to the day before). It all started on friday itself, with my manager coming up with another one of those ideas that makes you wonder %$#^ - to have a team cricket match, at 8 AM the next morning!! Curses, pleas, brickbats came his way from all sides of the team, but he was not a man to be swayed. So, here i was, at 8 on a saturday, standing on a cricket ground, barely able to control the shivering.
Thankfully, the match turned out to be more symbolic than what i'd though, with 3 of the 8 ppl failing to show up, and the rest in no mood to do anything at all. Just a few overs of struggling with bat and ball were all it took to send us packing back to home, with joints aching as if everest had just been conquered. But just as I'd happily trotted into home, aiming to stealthily make my way into bed till lunchtime, disaster struck, with the family declaring about plans to be out in 15 mins, and head towards a day-out at Akshardham temple!
Phew! What a behemoth of a monument is that place...just the parking expanse becomes tiring to cross. But it sure is a nice change from the regular expected experience at such huge religious places - well organised, informative...it resembles a museum more than anything else.
Anyways, after negotiating through the animatronics, boat rides, miles of walking, we finally got through with it, and I resumed plans to doze off right in the car itself. But lo and behold...such wonderful plans weren't meant to be...as my enthu-about-masala-movies brother reminded that we'd made advanced booking to watch - yeah u guessed it -Dhoom 2 - at a shady south delhi theatre!! All my "God bless PVR for not showing the movie" chants failed. My repeated rants about the new levels of crapiness the movie achieves were yet again ignored as the already sleepy me was dragged into a 10 to 1 nightshow.
Well, I can't find anything to write about the movie. Just can't. Skateboards that move faster than a Honda CBR can leave you too stunned to speak. The only consolation was to be proven right, at the end, that the movie did suck. Bigtime.

As the horridly tiring day drew to a close, I was too exhausted to even let out a whimper of complaint on being reminded that the wedding season had begun, and I had to be mandatorily present at each and every one of them.
And you thought weekdays were scary...

We are the champions....

And bad mistakes
I've made a few
I've had my share of sand kicked in my face
But I've come through

Nothing like listening to Queen, especially at times like these :D

The questions without an answer!

A Diwali weekend, crackers that make more noise rather than exploding: ka-ching!, Motor Cycle Diaries and the biography of Che Guevara - A deadly combo that can shatter your self-beliefs and make you question yourself.

You see your friends running to add that extra zero at the end of their paychecks and at the same time you see that poor fellow trying to remove the zero from his.

Are we on the road to progress?
Definitely not that kid who looked bewildered, seeing the sky lit up with a thousand colors (or was it the thousand rupee note)

India is progressing.
Salaries sure are.
And so is the disparity among the different sections of society.
Juvenile Crime rate is.
Naxalite and Maoist revolutionaries are.

So what is the solution to all this?
A revolution.
A communist government at the center.
A more socially-responsible corporate sector.
Or maybe more and more people giving back to the society.

I don'’t have the answers.
Hell, I don'’t even know the questions yet.

ic (why) ci

A company sells 2 products - A (costing 1,000 bucks) and B (costing 10,000 bucks); both at the same profit margin.
Now any economic book would tell you that it's all about the volume and numbers. The company sells A in much larger numbers as compared to the product.

But there is one market which defies all the rules of economics, comes up with its own chutzpah and makes the economists eat their words. India i.e.

The company being discussed is ICICI Lombard and the products: A - 2 wheeler insurance, B - 4 wheeler insurance.
The number of passenger cars sold in India in FY'06 was 2.4 lakh. Well, Hero Honda alone sold that much bikes in the month of August'06 :-O
Yet, almost all the 4 wheeler owners get their vehicle insured and a minuscule percentage of 2 wheeler owner theirs'.
Which directly means that companies like ICICI Lombard are not getting the expected revenue from the later.
Which indirectly means bad service and almost nil enthusiasm among the agents for pushing 2 wheeler insurance (These people are ready to collect the cheque for 4 wheeler insurance from your choice of place/time but wouldn't except cash for 2 wheelers' at their office)

And this isn't the lone case. If asked about ICICI bank, I could go on and on...

So much for the reforms, privatisation, demand and supply shaping the economy.
(My local govt owned insurance agent would blatantly demand for a Rs.50 note but at least get the job done)

p.s. wrote a 'disgusting' mail to all the icicilombard.com mail ids i could gather (including that of the operation head, mkting head, and other damn heads..suckers.. :P

Week(ends) with days


15 hrs at office followed by a DP with ol'college friends and you know that the weekend has arrived.

And before you realize it, you are supposed to go to n different places, eat all kinds of stuff and drink at the host's mercy.
And compare that to a normal weekday: home-to-office and office-to-home is all that you are supposed to do. All you get to eat is the ghissa - pitta food served by the cafeteria and drink what !!!!!!

Life couldn't have been any more strikingly different.

Good Will Hunting

At the mall the other day, hanging out with buddies (er..correction...colleagues), as we headed to a nearby restaurant to grab a bite, I saw an elderly couple walking out from the place. Now call me old-fashioned, but I really like (don't know the reason why, though!) to see old people having a nice time at the mall (which is o/w supposed to be a youngster's haven). Anyways, being the gentleman that I generally am, I pulled the door and held it open as the two walked out. But just then, to my utter disgust, a colleague of mine, who seemed as if he had'nt eaten anything in months or had a really bad case of diarrhoea, rushed through the door, literally pushing the couple out of the way, and almost stepping on to the poor lady, just to flash an ostentatious grin and a 'thanks, yaar' at me.
I don't know why I felt sooo bad at all this. But at that moment, if I could, I would have really landed a blow on the ass' s face, probably even asked him to apologise. But then again, the years of training that have been spent in learning to control onself and not making a scene held their own, and I spent the lunch sulking away instead.
I mean, what's with most of the people and some basic manners, that they can't seem to get along? Are we too brash or uncivilised a society, that showing even a lil bit of politeness seems too hard? Or maybe too worthless...
Hard to say.

Ranjana, Ranjana...who the {beep} is Ranjana

Another addition to the shining list of accomplishments that this govt. of ours can be proud of. The union ministry for broadcasting has decided that the Indian society is still too childish and immature, that it is unable to decide what should and should not be seen on TV. That, it is too stupid that any TV content must be filtered for objectionable content, before the poor junta is exposed to it. Can't blame them for thinking this way though, 'cause anyone who brought them to power in the first place, must be nothing short of a dumbass.

And hey...no hard feelings regarding the title...just thought it conveyed the idea quite accurately...n besides its hard to have those for someone you don't really know/care about.

Strange.

You meet people you never met before.
You talk to strangers you never knew before.
And yet, you stop talking to people you talked to before.

The vicious cycle sways away.
People come and people go. A few stay, the rest fade away.

The pictures are there, the names are there.
But you can't remember the people they were.

Too embarrased to ask their name again, you find it comfortable to leave them disdained.

And yet, you will meet them again.
With a brand new face and jazzy name.

The vicious cycle sways away.


---- sabbath, bloddy sabbath ----

187 life stories.

187 lives were lost in the Mumbai Train Blasts.
Indian Express carries an article on it's front page covering a victim's life story a day.

Reading one after the other, you'll realize that you have seen this earlier.

Final Destination, anyone?
People who were not supposed to be at the place they were on that day.

The story will fade away but the irony will remain forever.

Lost in a sea of souls

Had a sucky annual day party at some fancy five star yesterday. Damn those hotels suck at making food for a party-it was worse than my friendly-neighbourhood-dhaba.
Nyways...not deviating from the point, there was something apart from the bad food and the bad music and the bad crowd that troubled me. Troubled me so deeply that it forced me to write a blog!
Consider this. A hall packed with the company's employees. Lotsa colleagues, team mates around. Throw in a dozen or so people from the company whom i call friends as well. But still...once the forced greetings, a bit of chit-chat, and the customary mud-slinging of the company/party was over, I found myself at a loss of words. I just cudnt think of what to talk about. Conversations were forced. The smiles and laughs...faked. Even on the dance floor...it was as if I'm standing in the middle of a performance...people, whom I dint feel I even knew...dancing around me...pulling me to join in. But there was no connection. Whatsoever. And all this, despite mine being quite high as well!!
I tried to make a desparate, last effort to call Blatherer, but the ass refused. Then, thankfully, a good ol' friend from the school times happened to call me, and I ended up talking to him for almost an hour in the lobby. Ah...the joy of an unabated flow of conversation! That was for me the most enjoyable hour of the party.
So now a bit of gyaan: NOTHING makes a party more fun (not even booze) than the company of good friends. And also, the luckiest people are those whose colleagues (whom the percieve to be friends) are actually friends...........sadly, mine are not.

Post Surrogate

I know this doesn't count as a post but check this linkout it is hilarious
http://www.cs.purdue.edu/homes/dec/essay.criticize.html

Wanna race, punk.

'performance' bike vs. 'puny' scooterate.
12 horses vs. 7 horses.
4-3-2-1-2-3-4 vs V-matic.

Never thought a girl on an Activa would give my ol' machine a run for its money.
But the sheer driving skill, experience and hard determination made the rookie bite the dust.
The road to Sec-14 was never this fun before.

Who the hell is anonymous.

Ok, it do feels good to see someone 'reading' your blogs and posting comments.
But some anonymous fellow, linking me to an insurance / utility site. That something which really pisses me off.

@Bertie -
(Oh, I'm sick and tired of this) Share the damn admin rights to stop this stuff, since we know you are a bit easy down there :(
If not me / zz9 then atleast madmita or marvin (u still there, buddy!!)

The 1% Rule

Posted in Guardian (cross-linked through Emergic) :

'It's an emerging rule of thumb that suggests that if you get a group of 100 people online then one will create content, 10 will "interact" with it (commenting or offering improvements) and the other 89 will just view it.'

In our case:

For every god-knows-how-many people who are online, 3 'provide' content and 3 people 'interact' and 3 people 'view' it.

Freedom finally

Looks like the government has started listening up to protests from people like us.
News article in techtree

Blogger Blocked!

This is 21st century India. Where, whn a series of blasts rocks the business capital of the country, the best retaliatory measure that the govt. can think of is to block blogging sites. The torchbearers of the freedom of expression in today's connected world.
Is it only me, or does everyone feel that the people governing us, designing policies for us, are so disurbingly dumb that they don't realise...a free mind shall always oppose anything that is being imposed on it...just like imposing reservations is doing exactly the opposite of what it's motive is (er...removing social barriers and caste-based suspicions/hatred....right?)...similarily curbing freedom is the worst possible way to combat hate-based terrorism... for someone wanting to poison the minds of others to initiate them into terrorism, blogging would be probably the most insignifacnt way....but a fanatic blogger unable to quench his urge to pen down his daily thoughts can sure lose his mind and in place of the pen, pick up an AK-47 instead!

P.S.> though what the geniuses at good 'ol IT ministry missed out are the tons of proxi-fy sites that allow anyone to access any damn website...Hail Free Will!

Brave or Indifferent.

The day after the Mumbai blasts.

The newpaper says -

Mumbai'ites cope and will move on.
Everything normalized. Things will go on as if nothing happened.

Is it really so?
Are we brave enough to move on or are we just indifferent?

What did you tell yourself on hearing the news of the blasts? - Shit. that was bad.

Hidden cult of the corporate punk

Creased, tucked in shirts. Crisp business suits. Matching ties. Immaculate speech and mannerisms. The all-accepted image of the corporate world. An image conjured out of the need to be presentable. The need to impress, to leave an impact, and ultimately the need to do business.
But is all this natural??

Damn Fight Club is a great movie. True cinema. Shakes you up and forces you to think. Not to forget, entertains you like no other.
But such grotesque, in-your-face portrayal of everything can sure have some lasting effects. On the psyche ... the rationale to judge what is correct. Or rather, what is thought to be right, but is actually not.
Man is not built to be pleasant. Hell, no other creature in the known universe is. To be presentable...socially acceptable, is a burden, and not the fruit, of what has become to be known as human society. If there is a God up there, he might as well cringe each time someone sneezes and the people around, customarily, say "God bless".

Another thing the movie forces me to think, is that more so than not, people would hate following these stupid pleasantries and customs imposed by society. People driving us to the office, the xerox machine operator...hell maybe even our colleagues and team leads. People whom we think we are unrelated to, but in whose company our life is spent. A seemingly innocent, pleasant face, hiding beneath it the craziness characteristic of a true punk. A mind, trapped in an alien world, imposed, suppressed....ready to explode at any given moment....
Look around...and what do you see? People in a constant state of rage, hurrying around, brashing out aloud on their fancy cellphones...forced into the rat race by capitalistic corporate powerhouses controlling their lives...doing what they don't want to...buying what they don't need....and then made to believe all this to be traits of good citizenship....
One may see all this as something natural, inevitable....i see a punk revolution brewing up...

P.S.>Please don't watch Fight Club more than twice within a week, and go visit a shrink if u do.

The gud, The Bad, The Silly....

Bertie Wooster is the foppish, nutty, and very wealthy (soon-to-be in this case) co-protagonist and narrator of P. G. Wodehouse's Jeeves stories. Now i ain't called betrie for nuthing....usually it's Jeeves, whose genius manages to extricate Bertie or one of his friends from numerous awkward or difficult situations. But alas!! here there was none.

Infact Wodehouse societies from all over the world are famouse for organising large-scale pranks. Well as for as pranks go this was a gud one.....but a few things here :-

1. No i don't feel bad....i mean pranks are meant to be played on frnds...especially poor'ol bertie (phew!! thank heavens not many ppl read this blog though)
2. I wasn't high, infact i remember smoking abt 3 joints (most i had at one time till now) at blah's home n telling him how this stuff ain't gud....i guess the bigger fun was in making the joints with help of seesh!!Also one of the joints is still lying in my house somewhere (holy shit!)...so that pretty much speaks of the "high" i had.
3. Have to say though.....there was this nice-weird metro ride with madmita after smoking the shit....but then again our weirdity trancends clouds of silly smoke.
4. Side effects to the prank : my kurta almost caught fire, my car got little bit burned and ofcourse messing up madmita's throat!!
5. Finally i knew about this since quite somef time actually...not gonna say how.

2nd time unlucky

Well the whole thing was supposed to come as a package.
The actual execution and then the act of telling everyone about it.

But as they say - you can fool all of them some time, but you can't fool some of them all the time. (ok that was crappy)

It started with bertie asking us to provide him with some grass.
But since we had none, we manufactured some :)
Right from the tree under my house I took some dead leaves, grinded them till they resembled some what to actual grass.

Then came the D-day and we passed on this stuff to bertie and guess what he was getting high on it.
Voila, we had invented grass. And it was available aplenty - in the garden, on the porch, on the tree........

Things were getting a bit out-of-hand when he passed the stuff to madmita as well.
Don't know whether she got high or not. (my bet is on the former)

But unlike all things which end on a happy note, things went berserk.

We wanted to end all this thing with a bang - big blog, pictures attached and the works.
But, my guess is that Bertie got hold of the whole thing thru someone else thus leading to more confusion, mistrust, tension :(

Anyways, now that bertie has gone far away we'll have to find a new bakra for such pranks. Any one game?


Private Messages

@bertie - chill dude. it was just a silly joke. we know you'll feel bad but things will change one day and you'll get a chance to aim at my & zz9's ass.
@madmita - you became a passive victim. just stranded in the cross-fire :D

Sports Overloaded

Never considered myself to be a sports fanatic. Never was, actually. I have fond memories of me sitting under a tree, trying to make sense out of an Arundhati Roy, and several classmates calling me to join the ongoing game, much perturbed on losing out on such a fine athlete...
But how times have changed. The past two weeks have been a life-transforming period. God bless soccer, and god bless the World Cup. No longer does TV seem suitable for anything other than sports. Guzzling beer and shouting aloud during a soccer match... all seems so natural now.
And not just soccer. There's Alonso strutting his stuff, troubling Schumi. And the women's semi-finals at good ol' Wimbledon have been no less exciting than a proper catfight. Hell....I even watched golf for an hour recently....and thank god, the list does NOT include cricket (read: the dead sport)

Yaay!....TV's fun again....

I'm back kiddos!...

back from the summer hibernation...
as the dark shadows of the HAnce King leave us for two years, an opportunity knocks for unprecedented wackiness to shine its way thorugh...

Blog is Dead

Officially announcing the demise of this blog and the dreams of its denizens to break into something ........

The CRACKdown begins

2 more days to go.
Or maybe a few more days, coz I don't think Bertie would be free enough to soak up the fun :)

Good Times..Bad Times..

GD and Shubh trying to pass off Sprite bottles as the beer bottles

Zero (The best band in India, presently)

Zero (Missed Warren though)

End of the day

The biggest cover-up in the history of the world (or this blog) is still locked up...
...in the minds of 2 senechaux' (lol)....and would soon surface, as the end of the world (or this blog) approaches...
In your face, Dan Brown.

Countdown Begins

12 more days to go.

Beep....beep....beep....beep

.....thats my pulse. Just wanted to say I'm alive though barely. Bertie could we have a pulse check from you too :)

365 days.

That's how long it took.

An year ago, fresh out of college, started working.
New place, new faces, new names to remember, new concepts, new fundae about life, new perspective, new thoughts, new randomness, a complete new setup which I was never accustomed to.

Looking back, I should say every thing's not changed.

Few things remain the same but their context has changed.
People are same but their meanings have changed.
Faces are same but the character has changed.
The place is same but the address has changed.
I am the same but I have changed.

The 3 phases of Mukteshwar

Dawn

Rainy Afternoon

Sunset

I said, what do I know?
Show me the right way to go...


"Rule is evil, and it is none the better for being majority rule/democracy....What is the ballot? It is neither more nor less than a paper representative of the bayonet, the billy, and the bullet. It is a labor saving device for ascertaining on which side force lies and bowing to the inevitable. The voice of the majority saves bloodshed, but it is no less the arbitrament of force than is the decree of the most absolute of despots backed by the most powerful of armies."


Democracy, one of india's few shinging beacons in the current state of world affairs. A tool, used as much to feel proud about ourself, as it is used to leverage ties with the prosperous countries...and even at times to beg for help in times of calamity.
Democracy, taught to young minds thoroughout the country as the best, most impartial, just and righteous system of all.
Democracy,where the voice of PEOPLE is above all........

But is all this actually true??Is the current state of political affairs in our country the best it can be? Hardly...

• mass protests by the PEOPLE against misuse of reservation as a vote-bank tool, still no political party speaking against it...
• the judiciary being mocked at again; and again...at the whim of the RULING govt
• absurd promises of free power being fulfilled, crippling the state economies...
• no money to build roads in the country, yet no hesitation in increasing the millions already being spent on the burgeoning bureaucracy...
• an imminent energy crisis about to happen in near future...in on of the world's FASTEST economy
• a food grain crisis ALREADY here

what's going on? who are these people...supposed to be from whithin US, for US? where is the ACCOUNTABILITY? is democracy an EXCUSE for being wasteful, inefficient, power-hungry...and plain SHAMELESS? why is the NEW india, the intellectual hub of the world, at their mercy??
is there a solution? i want to vote...but who do i vote for?
is it time for a revolution...a change for the better? whom do we follow? marx? mao?...hitler?
i don't know.

"Democracy is nothing but the Tyranny of Majorities, the most abominable tyranny of all, for it is not based on the authority of a religion, not upon the nobility of a race, not on the merits of talents and of riches. It merely rests upon numbers and hides behind the name of the people."

Reservations. Do I care !!

Enough has been said and written about the whole Reservation for OBC's issue. But the matter of fact remains that only a handful of young, educated, urban youths cannot change the policy and no, I'm not a pessimist.

By reserving seats in higher education for OBC's, the Govt. has accepted that it has failed.

It has failed to provide basic primary education to the people from backward classes.
It has failed to uplift the social status of the backward classes.
But, where it does not want to fail is getting the support of the backward classes.

So, will the Govt. listen to the Youth of India.
With virtually no party opposing the move and no support from student unions (the real representatives of Indian students, as claimed by them), I really doubt so.

What can we do?

We can keep on protesting till the bill is passed.
See that what happened in Mandal-I is not repeated (I'm talking about Goswami).
Stop sending reservation mails in the same manner in which we forward junk to fellow friends (Show some respect to this serious issue)
?? Out of Ideas ??

Interesting Facts -

• Though the last caste-based Census took place in 1931, estimates say 51% of Indian population is OBC. 51% OBC's restricted to 27% seats. That's interesting.
• It is a fact that the real benefit of reservation will go to the Creamy Layer, but that will only make these students more miserable. The OBC's in urban India are educated and can afford the best education. By taking the help of reservation they are going to achieve nothing but self-degradation.
• The pro-reservation front often says that students from quota go back to the villages and are the one who are really helping the country. Truth is after taking the help of reservation, they become so habitual of this extra-help that they don't even try for jobs in private sector. Govt. jobs comes easy (quota again) and you can make a lot of money (apart from what the govt. pays you)
• The medical students are the one protesting the most as seats in PG are at its minimum. Engg. students, on the other, have way much more to grab.
• I doubt that, out of those protesting, even 50% voted in the last elections.
• The only thing which makes me happy about the whole issue is that people will finally start VOTING. The fact that their votes not really contribute much to the total electoral list is another thing.

Disclaimer - By writing this blog, I do not suggest that I support reservations or the protests should end. The more you'll protest, the more will you be able to come closer to your conscience. You'll be able to discriminate between Right and Wrong. You'll learn to stand up rather than hush down.

We don't want no reservation......

Meritocracy : a system of government/society based on rule by ability (merit) rather than by wealth, race or other determinants of social position.
India in future : a place where each position/oppurtunity is presented based on caste and one's family.

You may think that's too dire and i am sounding like one of those doomsdayers but unfortunatley it's not far from the truth. On saturday, for the first time i attented an organised, anti-establishment protest. It was regarding reservations the government plan to bring in centres for higher education. The main issues i have with the whole thing :-

1. Denial of fair and equal oppurtunities to deserving candidates n making it hell of a lot tougher for them to get into the institutes of thier choice.
2. Creating a society based on incompetence. For example, just imagine 50% of the teachers in government schools will from quota seats. Ok, all of them will not be bad teachers but most of them will not be upto the mark. Now, governnment schools is where most of the children coming from the lower n less priveleged sections of the society go to. We should be providing these kids with gud teachers n nice schools....but !!
3. The ridiculous double standards and myopic vision of our politicians - the infamous Mandal Commission report gave a two pronged approach to tackle the problem of social inequality. One ofcourse was the quota's but it also said that the reservations without changes in our education system at grassroot level is meaningless n substaintial effort should go in that direction. In grab of catching votes the second n more important action has conveniently been forgotten.

Right from the time the Constitution was written any sort of affirmative action was for removing the social inequalities present at the time of independence and not economic upliftment of backward classes. There are a great many anti-poverty schemes for that. Weather they work or not is an entirely different issue. Now, people of my generation i think give a lot less importance to caste boundaries then say thier parents. one would think that deep rooted predjuices would go subsequently in time. But by literally dividing every classroom into two parts the government is bringing that issue to the forefront for this genration and many future ones too.

Some suggestions:-
- Even if we have reservations in some form, give a time frame to them, infact initially these quota's were meant to be reviewed every 10 years but no politician has the guts to remove them.
- The benfits of reservation should be available for only one generation in a family - otherwise it's pretty much the same bunch who keep enjoying the benefits and the people for whom it's actually meant for aren't even educated about it.
- Provide better primary education and health facilities to the less privileged classes and think of a mechanism so that the benefits actually reach the
people who need it.

The protest march itself was gud, remained peaceful inspite more than 3000 people turning up. Lots off people from my company went as part of a corporate initiative which saw some 500 people from different organisations show up. What was gud to see was IT professionals, CA's, eminent doctors, ofcourse medical students and people from a wide cross-section of society came. Most of these people are probably not directly affected but very much concerned. I don't know if it's the RDB effect or what but such protests are taking place in Bhopal, Banglore, Orissa...pretty much all over the country. It's about time we educated folks stood up and be counted to make the little diference in making this country a better place.

Visit www.youth4equality.org to support the movement

Nuttin' New

blank....buick....busa....beemer....bones....build....
....buck....ban....book....big....bud....

and the thought process continues....

Cause it rained yesterday...

Ever been woken up at 2 in the night and then ended up being actually grateful for that? Happened to me last night, when the rain, thunder and lightening made a resolve so strong it made even me wake up from the slumber. But instead of feeling pissed, the feel of the fresh moist air, so rare in the Delhi summer, gushing through my window made me feel soo good, I actually got up and tiptoed upto the terrace to take in the feeling. And the sight was just unimaginable.

Pitch darkness of the night....the incessant, purple lightening rushing through the sky....drops of water being splashed on the face by the cold wind....

Who says you need some stuff to get high....

p.s.>just saw tht my Damn u Bertie-I am king-Hail Hitler(??) blog has reached 32 comments. Kinda like 32nd milestone (ugh)

Suspicious Activity

Has anyone recently noticed some funny thingies flying across the blog page...? I generally ignore such things cause frankly speaking most things we see on a webpage are useless anyways...but somehow a tiny bit of something zooming across the text when ur trying so hard to understand what's written can be a bit unnerving. Now try as I might, I cannot help but think about the reason why something wierd like this would happen on the blog:

• a mischief from a bored programmer at Blogger.com
• a trick by Blogger.com to dissuade us from wasting their preccciousss storage space with our worthless crap
• what the hell...wierd thigs are supposed to happen on a wierd blog like this
  ...............................................................................

A screenshot has been attached with a red mark for easy reference. Now some members may, and would, accuse me of being idle/work-less ( which FYI I am, wednesday onwards...), but taking a cue from a "How to make a presentation" session I was forced to attend, I could'nt stop myself.

Getting a finger, when it matters the most.

I am a good driver. Generally.

Riding in the correct lane. Not overtaking from the wrong side (bertie ??). Stopping at red lights when there's no one around etc etc.

Well, I was in bit of a hurry. Had to go to meet some ol' school friends and there was a big jam ahead of me. So I crossed the yellow line and was speeding away in the opposite lane.

Then suddenly I saw a car coming in front of me (opposite direction) and there was a girl driving the car with her middle finger in the air, pointed at me :(

Good to see responsible female drivers on road :)

Its the stupidity

Sometimes I'm forced to wonder how things around us, even the important ones such as television and the neighbouhood barber shop, keep slipping into a state of total squander without anyone batting an eyelid & thinking about salvaging them. Well, the bit about the barber may be exaggerated, but Indian television for sure has definitely become what can be entirely summed up as being utterly pathetic. I mean, when I look at the people around me, and then the ones on telly, there seems a divide so stark it feels almost unreal. There are women who can get away with multiple murders/forgeries, graduates who are called into board meetings at the office, sound effects that are borrowed straight from Star Wars, Gujarati families...well I can't even begin to describe their wierdity. Instead of waking up and trying something diferent for a change, all thse channels do is try to outrun each other in a who-makes-the-worst-family-soap race.
Even the English channels are'nt much respite. Apart from a few good shows, they too show mostly crap about teen crushes and the crime scene on a hawaii resort. But at least the cast is gorgeous, making them bearable to watch. Unlike most Gujarati-family-soaps which hire the ugliest people possible to be showed on national television.
Thank god for Discovery, NGC and the likes. If it were'nt for them, I would have exchanged my television for something more useful.

What saddens me is that there seems no respite from this stupidity even in future. Same is the case with Radio. Why are the people in the business of entertainment, who are supposed to be the best creative minds of the country, be satisfied with the current state of affairs. Wish someone could just shake them up.

Along came a spike


Well that's how I picture our blog.

A certain time comes when, suddenly, all the brains start working - posting blogs, comments on blog, comments on comments on blog.

Then comes a dud period........

btw just noticed a thing. The blog description says -

Around four years ago two specimens of the ape-descended species, which inhabit this utterly insignificant little blue green planet met. After a few months of relatively formal chit-chat they realized that they shared amongst them a rare brand of insanity. This blog is an attempt by these very same specimens and their friends to share their plethora of thoughts which range from the insanely sane to simply, insane.

bertie, I think the blog has grown from - hum do, hamare none to hum do, hamare chaar (whoever hum refers to)

Evangelising your blog

a nice blog by Guy Kawasaki on evangelising one's blog.

Of fat aunties and hungry children...

"I've had enough!! Me going and scolding that aunty", cooed my sister with nostrils flaring up n looking visibly angry. Next thing i see she does goes over to yalk to the aunty and then is picking up stuff from the floor.

So, incase u guys are wondering weather this post is like one of those movies where the cool stuff happens in the beginning n rest of the movie is spent retracing how it reached that point. Well, the answer is yes, it is one of those posts.

Flashback:-

So my sis n i are travelling comfortably on the metro when in walks an aunty with a small kid (abt 1 or 2 yrs old) with her. Delhi Metro is awesome...it's clean n pretty comfortable and although it stops almost every 2 kms...still it's a nice ride. It is the kind of public transport system this city was crying out for.

Now one thing i have noticed travelling on the Metro is how Indian middle aged women are badly outta shape. I mean no disrespect or discounting the fact that indians have a tendency to put on weight but it's like they are being subjected to gravitational fields in 10 different directions n the poor'ol bodies can't quite decide where to go. So one after the other aunties with bloated bodies walk in. So if ur comfortably sitting in a seat the ladies stand near u giving sinister looks or at times even ask you to 'thoda shift ho jao. Unfortunately, that 'thoda' is not quite a little bit n by the time they have wedged themselves between the coupla poor souls sitting on that seat the souls are clinging on by the tip of their finger nails with more than half the ass mid-air!!

Point is that the ladies (n Marvin, i may add) should gear up and get in shape to avoid inconvenience to themselves n other people. Also, this tendency in India of people piling next to each other in public transport/queues inspite of there being some space avilable. It violates personal space and is frankly disgusting.

Anyways, so the aunty n the kid have settled down n the woman thinks it's time to give the baby something to eat. She decides to feed him Kurkure of all things in this world. Now that's straight from the bestselling "The Good Guide For Parents". First of all she tears the packet open n throws some part of the cover down on the floor. My sister, who till now has been in semi-commatose mode n ignoring my presence all together suddenly wakes up nand has that
troubled expression on her face. Now, if she does have a mind there was definatley something on it!! The kid, surprisingly does not apreciate the Kurkure treat he is having n seems thirsty and half of the stuff is falling down anyways. Just then a man walks past and unintentionally steps on a poor kukura smashing it and further dirting the floor. So the sibling rises and goes onto have chat with the aunty.

Well, she didn't quite scold her...but asked her not to feed the baby and spread crap around n then proceeded to pick up the cover. It just amazes me how ppl here have a tendency...almost habitually complusive to spread crap around. And these are perfeclty well to do educated people. The hypocricy of it all is that the same junta will keep their own homes really clean n be proud of it!! It just gets to me the high ground we Indians take at times - we so civilised n our rivers are so pure and blah blah....but we don't think twice about throwing away crap all over our filthy cities n towns. Agreed we don't see too many trash cans around the place or the sanitation department is not the best in Delhi but that makes us even more responsible in keeping our city clean.

I myself don't walk up ppl spreading garbage around n tell them off....but if we don't spread it ourselves this place won't be half the garbage dump it currently is.

Worldspace - The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

Got my own Worldspace, thanks to people @ Siemens (who were way too contended by the stuff that plays on Delhi FM Channels)

Spent an hour, fixing the thing.
It needs to be oriented towards the SE directions. And sadly I can't see the Singapore from my balcony. So now there's a big 6 feet pole hanging horizontally from my window with the worldspace antenna on one end ;-)

The Good Part –

• Dedicated channels for Classic Rock, Alternate, Jazz, Country, Chart toppers, Classical etc. etc. (Punjabi, Bengali, Art of Living Channels also included)
• No ads, No chattering RJs, Superb Sound Quality

The Bad Part –

• No Intelligent Display (The songs will play on-and-on and you won’t be able to get any details about the songs)
• Still haven’t heard all the CDs, Cassettes, downloads that I have, talk about listening to new stuff.
• Could have been great if they had a portable receiver which you can carry anywhere like your iPod. But since it’s a satellite radio service, wanting something like this is near impossible.

The Ugly Part –

• The radio set provided by Worldspace (BPL Diva) *ucks (as pointed out by zz9 – thou shall not suck). It can only store 10 channels. No speakers. Bad Display.
• Wiring cumbersome (Imagine a wire coming from the window to your table, in case the table is diagonally opposite to the window)

In all, a good buy if you love MUSIC*. But in case you prefer Himesh Reshamiya and their ilk’s, stick to your daily dose of Red FM, Radio Mirchi and Radiocities of the world.

* Music can have different meaning for different people.

Damn You Bertie!
For putting this chatterbox of a blog in withdrawal mode with your recent retire-me-I'm-done posts
The posts have dried up worse than Delhi's taps ( cudnt find a better/worse comparison :( )
As have the comments...
To me it seems this blog is ready for cabinet...er...member reshuffle mode v1.0. It has reached a certain maturity level of idiocy...and can be expanded with a reasonable risk to accomodate new wierdos.
So try finding people around you with the zest for pouring out their unwanted-in-the-outer-world-thoughts...and resusciating this dying blog.

To blog or not to blog !!

Mostly Harmless is a rather interesting lil spec in blogosphere. Being one of the founding members makes me happy about it. That said my lack of contributions or should i say offerings at the temple of 'Random Whacky Chat', lately is not gud at all. But hey!! that's me. I rarely finish anything i start. I usually begin with great gusto only for enthu to peter out. I mean even preparing for CAT or the GD/PI, i eased up towards the end. So even if i am going to a decent institute i know that i definately didn't put in the sufficient amount of hardwork needed to crack the big ones (A,B or C).

So, Marvin n i decide one day to start a blog (sometime in early December). Those who knopw us wouldn't have been even a teeny-weeny bit surprised that the blog n it's feel was inspired loosely by D.Adams n PG Wodehouse. Ahem...well actually we stole the name of their book n characters. Like i mentioned earlier it was started out to be this wacky place where we could air n share any of our stupid, silly n non-sensical thoughts. Yeh there are plenty of them in our heads. Then ofcourse, the loony group was increased by including other nutty pals. Infact now one of the things i do everyday in the morning is to visit Mostly Harmless. Inspite of the rate of new posts being as fast as a lazy n sleepy tortoise, it's become a sorta habit. N boy has this place evolved....it's seen gud times, spats, patch ups, theories, primers to theories, poems, serious discussions and the works. What such a place needed was a collection of crazy'ol nicombpoops.

As the following Murphy's law indicates:
"The chance of the bread falling with the buttered side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet."

TaDa....so you have :-

- Blah : straight talkin dude. Never shy to call a real fart a fart....he brings some sembelance of order to the crazy randomness over here. Infact he along with ZZ9 are the lungs of this blog, however polluted and full of holy smoke those lungs are.

- ZZ9 : writes insightful & funny enteries and also the one with the biggest female fan following. Definately the most regular...thank heavens i sent him an invite. His posts gen bring a smile to my face weather its coz he messed it up big time with a super-dupah, ultra rich chic or imagining him wearing a turban on top of that silly grin he wears all the while.

- Madmita : ah....well moody, wonderfully weird n at times awesome writer with a penchant for inflicting temporary disorientation to readers n fellow bloggers. As if what was being said on this blog wasn't crappy enough and covered the entire space dimension of this universe, she brings in a time variable. Posts with a mind of their own....they are there one day...only to decide ah well...we're bored with these geysers n then disappear.

- Marvin : me pal is just too busy to write. Knowing Marvin, the workaholic that he is its not surprising. He's like the non-preforming assets (haha MBA jargon already) a company holds. Soo c'mon u disgusting piece of crap...move those fat lazy fingers and type away. Btw, Delhi ka trip bana yaar !!

So this is the story of this blog, where ppl share joys, sad thoughts, fustrations, general observations, social commentary n stuff....only its all mostly harmless.

High vs. Higher

Those who were high -


And those who were not -


Moral of the Story -

Dope not only makes you high, but also saner

Yo baby Yo baby Yo baby Yo!

Statutory warning: this post is a follow-up on the last post by Blatherer...if u just hated it ur in for some more...But before I begin...whats's with the rest of you? I knw ur life ain't s hep as mine/blathy's, but no post in >20 days is way too much.

Here goes nothin::

• There were 21 ppl in the trip. 21 distinct minds, plus some ppl whose asses had thier own minds. So we're talking of approx 35 distinct minds here, most ones not so clean.
• Girls gone so high that they can rattle on for 48 hrs, and abuse each other in a language that'll put sailors to shame...is not such a fun idea, not any more.
• When you stand on the edge of a cliff 2 stories high, about to leap down, you can't stop shivering. And it ain't the cold. Still you take the next step. Blame it upon a rush of blood to the head...
  
• When the holes ur meant to "make the shitty deposit" into start to overflow, it's time to leave the camp ASAP.
• When ur high...really high...singing suddenly comes to u so naturally, esp if you sing real bad. And then u keep urging/pushing/abusing the poor guitarist to match upto Hendrix and churn out tunes for you to blare on.
• Punjabi jats are slightly better than east-delhi-businessmen-ki-bigdi-aulad
• When ur in front of 10 camp-tents each lit by its own laltain, the moonlight caressing the entire beach, the bonfire heat warming you up, the river-breeze on ur face, on a picture perfect night, AND ur high...is when you realise wht being high means.
• When a pony-tailed, chinki instructor teaches you the raft-motto (incidentally the title of this post), no matter how exhausted you are after a rapid well-negotiated, you still blare your heart out with rest of the group, much to the delight of other rafters.
  

The last 48hrs have been a heady mix of anger, bliss, frustration, excitement, chaos, exhaustion, spirituality....Now I'm slowly breaking through the daylight...

Holy Smoke

Exactly 48 hours ago I got off the raft.
Paddling continuously for 20KM had taken its toll. I was so hungry that I didn't even bother to look for spoon and started eating off my hand (Soon realized, though, that I was the only person doing so)

Jottings from the trip -

- Was supposed to start at 8:30. Reached meeting place at 8:30. Played games on Rajat's PS, watched some new videos and finally started at 9:30.
- For around 1.5 hours wondered around Noida just to realize that the road we finally reached could have been reached in 15 mins .
- Out of the 21 odd people travelling in the bus, I knew only 6-7. So, was ready to face a lot of weird people.
- The odd shape of the Bus seats won't let me sleep. Took turns to sleep on seat meant for two .
- Were a good 25km away from the final destination when the bus driver announced that he won't move an inch forward.
- After a light breakfast and a small drive to Marine Drive, started off on raft with 11 other guys.
- Rapids have strange nomenclature. Eg. Good Morning, Black Money, Three Blind Mice, Roller Coaster.
- Getting inside the raft on your own (while you are in water) is not only tough but impossible.
- Jumping from a height of 10 meters into the Ganges is scary enough to let fart pass by your's.
- There are people who act stupid when sober and sober when drunk.
- Sadhus actually asked us not to smoke ganja.
- Although there's a big hole at the bottom of a Chillam, the grass won't pass through. It'll remain stuck at the upper half of the chillam
- Nearly killed a guy (who was just relaxing by the river) when a rock (the size of my palm) hit him on his neck. Obviously, thrown by me.
- The guys in the bus maybe thinking that we are big time junkies who can't do without their daily dose.
- In just 60 hours, I left my seat, travelled 250kms away, did white water rafting and all the crazy things mentioned above and am back at my seat :-O

Zzzz...... I'm Sleepy ........

The last few days have been crazy.

Waking up at 6:30, reaching office by 9.
Sitting around, trying to break all the legs of my chair till 9 in the evening and finally home - just to have dinner and a quick nap to repeat the whole process again and again and yet again.

And than I meet old friends asking me questions - So what's up ?
And seriously, I dont know how to answer that question.

Maybe life has become a bit monotonous (No. I haven't reached the mid-age crisis yet)
Work has started sucking a bit.
Want to wrap up things before any one notices it but only if I could !!

Will have to start doing something new.
Maybe, taking up guitaring seriously or even renewed interest in biking.

Hope I never say these words - Life Sucks.

P.S. That's a bloody dipressing bullshit that I just wrote. I'm squinting to read the screen properly. Someone is headbanging in my head. It's taking too long to download these Skinny Alley songs. ZZZzzz..................

Livin it up at the land of Maharajas
As I got up last Saturday, with my head spinning from the headiness of Pink Noise (awesome band, btw), and the beer still gurgling around in my system, I could'nt help but curse myself for agreeing to go to Jaipur for another damned wedding of a kin long forgotten. Dammit, a not-so-wise dude once told me that I go to a lot of weddings. Can't help realise he was actually right.

But the multitude of experiences crammed into 2 days was all that was needed for me to actually end up having a uniquely wonderful time at Jaipur. After all, to me going to the city of Kings, was like a second homecoming itself...
Anyways, as the 2 days were filled with events so entirely distinct, I'm having a hard time trying to build them into a coherent paragraph. So lord praise the man who invented bullets (not real ones, but these stupid things I'm gonna use here)

* Well these are actually not bullets.

* Wore a PAGDI for the first time in my life. It gives the same feeling you may have if you eat too much food, which would then go up ur brain than down your tummy.

* This reminds me, though I very happily took the digital cam, looking to capture some royal beauties in the rustic backdrop of a Jaipuri wedding, I forgot it at the hotel room itself. It was only when a thousand camera flashed were going on in my face that I realised that I could actually join them.

* So no pic of the PAGDI either :(. But did manage to visit some spots the day after and get clicking...



* At the wedding, I had a startling revelation that I actually tend to merge better with the Dadajis & Dadjis rather than folks of my own age. Maybe this reflects on my current state?

* Got drunk and played bluff with my cousins, and ended up employing the same tactic Abhay used the last time I was in Jaipur, to save my pennies. Hope the paper was sterilized.

* In the morning after, I had a breakfast comprising of milk and cereal...what, no... milk a.k.a.rabri and jalebi. And lots and lots and lots of it. Had to loosen my belt by 2 slots afterwards, but what the heck. Royalty doesn't really care about such stuff...

* In the evening, went to Nahargarh fort, the place where the RDB gang supposedly went to chill out after a hard day at DU :((...god these hindi movies can bluff. There was some kinda fest going on there, with some reeeally out-of-this-world characters roaming about...



* On the way back, with the car burning serious rubber at around 120 kmph, the endless trees rushing past my window, I was put in some kind of a trance where the entire 4 hour journey seemed to end in a moment...or span an entire lifetime...

And now, even as the damned admin (wierd thing, these words rhyme so well) at office have decide to even block out blogger, as I fight the ever growing force trying to push me into slumber, I make this resolve to tell that not-so-wise dude to mind his own business, and never pass up the chance of going to another wedding ever again. Hey, you may end up enjoying things other than the endless, free food... 

Rang Barse....

Flashback...March 13th,2006..... its yet another boring Monday evening and I am sitting at my desk thinking how quickly the weekend had whizzed by (it was quite an amazing weekend, more on that in the next post :)). To make matters worse Holi is less than 48 hours away and what I can't get over is the fact that we don't even have a bloody holiday that day!!!! Well anyways, I was able to convince some friends to drop the idea of celebrating holi at dinner time and called them over to my place in the morning to celebrate holi 'Dilli Ishtyle' >:). Well just as I had 'not' expected this Holi turned out to be one of my most enjoyable Holis ever. They say a picture is worth a thousand words, so I'll stop here and well...this is what we looked like at the end of it all.......

Haha :)...I was just kidding when I said I would stop there. As I look at my still-partially-pink-around-the-edges nails I can't help but describe the entire sequence of events. So I was woken up at the crack of dawn (read 9am :)) by 5 of my friends happily ringing the doorbell away to glory. And before I could prepare for the war ahead by covering myself with cold cream and oil I was looking like a high quality cross breed of man and monkey with half of my face pink and the other half my own handsome self :). Unfortunately, the half-man-half-ape look didn't last too long because we moved to the terrace where with each passing moment we started looking more and more like our ancestors :).

Anyways, fun as the holi was it lacked the 'dilli' touch. So cleverly making an excuse to get my roommate (the guy in the photo who looks like the victim of an explosion in Tom& Jerry) I went downstairs to pick up those gifts of hens to mankind which we have shunned these days thanks to avian flu....eggs. Well it was here that things took on an interesting turn. Now studies say that different people react differently to eggs. The effect it had on my first victim is worth documenting and should provide valuable insights to pyscho-analysts all over the world. A cracked egg on my friend's head seemed to rouse the sleeping Bruce Lee in her. And before I could help it I got 5-6 taekwondo kicks squarely in my butt. The sequence of events was so shocking to me that I got a bout of apoplexy and ended up like this :).....Well so that was that for Holi. After scrubbing myself for nearly an hour I headed off to office looking well....still pretty pink....but clean. The moment I stepped into the office and opened my laptop I was jumped by one of my team mates who covered my face with purple color.
while(i!=I-lost-count-how-many-times-this-happened)
{
Thinking this to be a one off event I went and washed my face only to be colored back to purple but this time by another colleague;
i++;
}

The rest of the work day was pretty much the usual...had a heavy lunch and slept on my desk :). In the evening all of us were invited over for dinner at my friend's place (lets call her PowerpuffGirl for ease of reference...those reading this post with care would not find it difficult to relate this character to the Bruce Lee descendant mentioned above). Had an awesome home-cooked dinner because another friend's, who happens to be PowerpuffGirl's roommate and a fellow colleague (unfortunately she isn't there in the picture above...I think she took the picture)...well yeah so her mother and sister had come down for Holi. In all it was a very nice Holi. However, fate, as I have said before, was quietly slipping lead into the boxing glove as it prepare to punch poor-ol'-unsuspecting me. It seems that PowerpuffGirl, on account of being a pure vegetarian, had gone into shock after the egg incident and decided to get back at me once again by squashing a tomato on my head. And so feeling like how Adam would've felt had the bible said that the actual sin was not the consumption of the forbidden apple by Eve but simply the fact that Eve whacked Adam with a tomato, I headed back for home thinking that this Holi was quite an 'eggs'perience.

And the story goes on....

Well...march has come and gone. Brought with it some amazing weather. It rained, was windy, sunny, even foggy on couple of mornings. It's only now that proper summer seems to be setting in.

The last time i wrote on Mostly Harmless was on 2and March. Whoa!! lots of stuff happened since then. Infact, it's been a long long week. Worked late almost every day, went out a couple of times with friends (on friday and saturday). Felt happy, sad, bored, interested, fustrated...hell i didn't sleep one night coz i was ill and up shivering n pucking away. All in all an interesting week - had fun and came to know new stuff about myself which helps for more battles ahead.

Some events that happened and i remember (2-25 March) :-

- Played holi with pals after quite a few years
- Got really drunk n wrestled with friends....awesome fun
- I worked :) ya it really did happen
- Attended a gig by one of the best guitarists in India (more on that later)
- Couple of IIM interviews
- It rained cats and dogs in delhi one day and i drove in such rain for the first time with a coupla high (drunk) people as co-passengers!!

The long, dark tea-time of the blogging soul......

Hello there!!! After a long hiatus from the world of blogging, I am back!!! (I know you all have tears of joy in your eyes and are wondering what good deeds you did in your past lives to deserve the honour of my return to the blogging community :), but its ok....as the saying goes 'Life is beautiful' or is it...'Every dog has its day'..ahem :)).

And another feature of 'Marvin, the blogger' v 2.0 is that he's totally new and improved.....pretty much like all new releases...except that after some time 'new and improved' bugs are also discovered in the 'new and improved' releases :)......god this software industry is getting to me!!

So I will start by trying to update you guys on the incidents in my life. So expect a free flow of posts in the near future. For the moment, I will sign off with another wise saying from none other than Bruce Wayne aka Batman.....'I am your worst nightmare....' >:).

bliss

10:50 AM

My entire team decides to ditch me and go on a mass bunk today.

Sitting at my desk, alone in the aisle, I feel disoriented. Just wanna run away from all this myself. As if under some kind of a spell that binds me, pulling me away.

But wait. Not again. Can't waste more time this way. I desparately need something to jerk me out of this feeling.

Ah! A ray of hope. A half-eaten bar of bitter swiss chocolate in my drawer, saved from the client meeting last week for desparate times. Call it manna from heaven if you may.

As I dig my teeth into the heavenly Lindt, put on Time of your life on the headphones, and just sink back into the chair, I am pulled back into my cheery self.

Feels good to realise that Bliss ain't that hard to attain.

Y didn't she just stick a dagger in me

I wish my computer had crashed today. Or been attacked by a virus which would have corrupted that satanic piece of software called yahoo messenger. Or at least god should have prevented me from making the first mistake of logging into it .Because today a seemingly harmless chat almost gave me a heart attack.
7 p.m., and here I am happily chatting to a a good 'ol chap, listening to his take on the contenstants of Miss India this year. Then suddenly, out of the blue, a msg window poops in my face, and there she is. One of my best friends. And more importantly, my high school crush. Damn that wretched soul who gave her my msgr id.
Anyways, I try to put up a bold front, though I'm literally stammering even on the msgr. And then comes the second mistake of the day. In reply to her-so-whats-new-me-nothing yaar, I ask her back the same question. This is the moment when she decides to launch a tirade of accomplishments that make me feel like digging up a hole in the earth and bury my face in it-

She tells me tht after school she got into NID, where luckily her industrial project client in final sem was none other than BMW. So a month later, she's in Germany, where after the project she gets absorbed into BMW itself, simultaneously pursues a 1 year PG degreee in advanced automotive design, then moves to the US, pursues a 1 year degree in Business from harvard, joins Boeing, finds an Indian bloke who also happens to be a high-profile neuro-surgeon.
She goes on to tell me that she just bought a Porsche, she's getting married this summer, and took my address to send an invitation. And no, she does'nt stop at this. She starts photo sharing, and one after another, I'm presented with proofs of her feats.Ohhh, does she look gr8...

And u knw wht, I saved the (almost)last 2 lines frm the chat, which actually form the worst part:

kaustubh_bhatnagar: Hey if u ask so much...I'll tell...actually I had a crush on you.
heena kalra: I knw tht,and u knw, i did too. But i guess it worked out for the best for both of us
kaustubh_bhatnagar: [Remind me to ask the yahoo guys to make a smiley for "Hang Thyself"]

Can't recall much after that cause that's precisely the moment when I blacked out.

Holy Holi !! (And the week before that)

Was asked recently - Why is Holi celebrated?
Must confess, was totally dumb struck.

Apart from remotely remembering someone called Holika getting burnt on this day, I knew nothing about the festival (Also, people getting drunk drinking bhaang and acting stupid)

But the girl, who asked the question, said that there were more than 3 reasons, so googled around and look what i found:

- An agricultural festival celebrating the arrival of spring

- An evil king named Hiranyakashipu wanted to kill his son, Prahlad (a devotee of Vishnu). So he challenged his son to sit on a pyre with his wicked aunt Holika who was believed to be immune to fire. But, as it always turns out to be in Hindu Mythology, the good guy is saved and the evil person dies. Thus we burn the effigy of Holika on a day prior to Holi.

- According to legend, the young Krishna complained to his mother Yashoda about why Radha was so fair and he so dark. Yashoda advised him to apply colour on Radha's face and see how her complexion would change. (And that explains why girls are the target on this day)

- Kama (Cupid) tried to kindle lust on God Shiva, but, instead, was burnt alive when Shiva opened his 3rd eye. Later he forgive Kama for the sake of Kama's wife Rati (passion)

So now that we have the complete reference, let’s talk about what we did.

Bertie called up, asking to come over. play holi ?? (after a gap of 8 years :D)

So I and ZZ9 went to Bertie’s place, where he was ready with eggs in his hands (disgusting!! Especially during these days of BirdFlu)

Similarly Shubh was ready with balloons in his hands, but this time around I was the one with egg in my hands and Shubh’s head as its target.

Rest of the day went ok, with us playing a strange game hitting each other with balloons and Bertie getting assaulted by a kid (the kid was throwing water, color, pesticide etc on Bertie :D)

What did you learn today?
Filling a bucket full of balloons takes an hour but bursting them hardly takes 5 minutes. (Does this signify something ??)

Part 2

The week before

What if you put four guys and a bottle of vodka and gin each – together, at a place where they can’t do much for entertainment?

Chaos!!

So there we were, after having watched Walk the line and our tummy full at Kebab King.

The night started well, with me deciding not to drink anything.

Same old stuff - forming a circle, pouring liquor in steel glasses, drinking, talking in hush tones.

Suddenly, Bertie declared – Let’s play Bhooth – Bhooth (!!). He got his share of kicks for the stupid game.

Shubh then came with the idea of wresting and soon there were people all over each other, kicking each other’s butt. With Bertie excusing himself for puke, every time he was getting beaten.

Everything cooled down after a while (an hour or so with the finishing photo shoot) and people started discussing about girls, life, marriage, work, more girls :D and so on.........ZZZzzzz.......

And for the sake of record keeping, ZZ9 puked after drinking too much (Welcome to the puker’s club)

P.S. Checked with Google. There are no ill effects of having Vodka + Rum together.

Wierd Weekend

There happen to be days that go by without you lifting more than a brow to acknowledge their passing. And then there happen to be not.
I don't really know what I was trying to say previously, but I do know that this particualr weekend, still on right now, definitely did'nt fall into the former category.
-Well to begin with, after being home alone for an entire week, it finally dawned on me on Saturday that how much I missed my parents. I swear to god, if i have to spend another week eating out of the fridge ever again, I'm commiting suicide.
-For the first time in my life I ate a breakfast of a bag full of popcorn.
-The evening was slightly better. Watched Crash, probably one of the finest pieces of cinema I've seen in recent past. After a long time a movie made me jump off my seat and say "Oh Shit"...something I last remember having done while watching Fight Club (not that recent piece of crap, the Brad Pitt-Ed Norton classic)
-After the movie, spent several rather uncomfy moments with Blatherer and Rawale, hearing Fauji's coming-out-of-the-closet speech! Seriously, spent 4 yrs in the same class and I had no idea he was gay.
-Forgot to mention, also had to hear about Fauji's endeavours with salsa :-(
(BTW, he told our Marvin was also trying his hand, i mean legs at salsa!? :-(( )
-After that, as Fauji thankfully ditched us much to Rawale's distress(?), the three of us went to my place for a rather uneasy night-out, comprising of watching a slapstick movie and sharing a tiny bag of cheese balls in a manner so gentle and civic, it was hard to believe.
-Another surprise. The next morning (today, that is), Chinki was in a hurry to go and did'nt even ask for breakfast, whereas Rawale on the other hand had to be fed on a feast of 1 bread slice+half a pack of tomato maggi before he finally went home.

So now, as this wierd weekend draws to a close, and as I devour another bag of popcorn, I can't wait to rush to the stn. to get my parents, and normalcy, back into my life. God I can already smell those paranthas...!

Its a bird, its a plane, shit its a football!!!!!

Football...the sport that unites europe is a sport which I should not play. But who cares about what one should not do ;)........yeah man....it was a bad experience...mistake....foolishness :) but I did go to play soccer yesterday morning. Anyways so after a tiring 15 minutes of play I was panting like a dog in the Sahara on an extremely hot day so I decided to become the goalkeeper instead. But fate, silently slipping the lead into the boxing glove as always, chose just my turn as goalkeeper as the opportune moment for there to be a penalty against the team. So here was this big guy from the opposite team all set to kick the ball at me but I maintained a calm facade quietly confident that all I had to do was not move and the ball would pass me by. But alas!! the fellow decided he would might as well utilize the opportunity to break a couple of bones of mine. So suddenly I saw the ball come towards my unsuspecting self like a multi-colored canonball. And so with the speed and agility I often display I tried to move out of the way but was beaten and the ball hit my dear ol' thumb making it turn a dark shade of blue. Hence ended the soccer career of a future football star.

Shut up, a$$#ole !!

- Nearly got my right big toe crushed. Turns out it's not broken...but is swollen and hurting. It was throbbing throughout the day n paining. Got used to it though, i think i'll miss the pain when it goes away.

- Had a conversation about : flowers in spring, birds, getting punched in the stomach, need for constant attention by us from ourselves, name of a beer, songs that stick in ur head throughout the day and about how energetic and lively the bougainvilleas are this time of the year. This was a 10 minute convo!!

- Hurt a friend, by making some stupid remarks....oh i ought to think sometimes before i open my mouth. Totally unintentional though, but we are judged by our words n actions and not intentions. Righty too. Realised it rather late in the day, but i hope i learn from it.

- Btw Marvin also hurt his right thumb. How ?? Well......playing football...huh ?!

One more for the Alumni Meet

Would like to add more to what ZZ9 said (btw what does it mean) -

The Alumni Meet at Moksha (NSIT '06) was more of a home-coming for the people who had just passed out the previous year.

And I dont think that being an year out of your alma mater qualifies you as an alumni. It was more like being back to college after vacations.

There were no nostalgic feelings about the place. It seemed the same as we had left it. The same unfinished Advanced Computer Centre, The same grass growing over the BH3 building (sic!), the same rowdy batchmates of mine :(

And since around 97% of the people meeting were from 2005 batch, you can't even term it as an Alumni Meet. (The rest 2% were not from our college and 1%, who were the actual alumni's were wondering if they were at the right place)

Moksha, eh?
So our enthu juniors decided to hold a special jig for the Alumni at Moksha this time around. Nice idea, I thought, 'cause the alumni network of NSIT sucks bigtime. Also, it would have been cool to be treated with repect at the college, for a change.
But all my dreams of a red-carpet welcome and fancy dinner were shattered at the college. Not only were the juniors quite indifferent in their attitudes, they also showed no hesitation in letting us know of their one and only motive :(. Even the dinner sucked, with people having to scrape food out of the utensils. Hey, maybe it was purposely done to revive the nostalgia of the hostel mess...

But the surprise of the evening was definitely the jam-session. The basketball-court had been efficiently transformed into what resembled an acces-controlled, grooving upmarket disc. The elitist snob of a premier engg institute (that some of us were so proud of) was changed into a bohemian ghetto of smoking, drunk and doped teens/post-teens, grooving to the tunes like B.C. Suttah (seriously!), and even singing along the unparliamentary-lyrics with full zest.
Maybe these ppl took the name of the fest too seriously!

Foot-in-mouth Disease

The recent bird flu scare prompted me to write about this disease I suffer from called the foot-in-mouth disease (please do not confuse it with the Foot 'and' Mouth disease which only affects the bovine segment of the animal kingdom ). I must warn you the disease can be near fatal especially at times when one gets the 'shut-up-dumbass-or-you'll-get-yourself-killed' fits.

I suffered from a really major fit of this sort yesterday. So it was a nice Sunday afternoon and I went to the office to jam for a while (yeah we have a band of some sort in office :)). But this jam session was different. A 6'5'' fellow(who also happens to be my boss) was here from Austin and he has a band of his own in Austin which was recently voted the second best Indie Rock band in Austin. So equipped with an excellent lead guitarist we jammed happily for a while (with little or no contribution from yousr truly since I didn't know the lyrics of any of the songs making it hard for me to do my duties, as the 'lead singer' of the band, to the best of my abilities). It gets a little hot in the storeroom where we play so we took a short breather for a while. We just hooked up a laptop and played some music on it. In a little chatty mood I commented how some bands dont focus on the lead singer. To support my case I gave the example of the song which was playing in the background. At this I got a really dirty look from Jon who went on to tell me that it was a song by his band, the midgetmen, and he had sung the enitre vocals for the song. So as you can imagine I turned a deep red and started stammering about, all tell-tale signs of a foot-in-mouth disease fit :).

So I hope you realize the seriousness of my condition and sympathise with me. In any case, if you're interested in Indie/Alternative/College rock you can give The Midgetmen (www.themidgetmen.com) a shot, its pretty ok.

Tech Musings

Apple has come with an ingenious way to discourage OS pirates.

The warning reads as below -

Your karma check for today:

There once was a user that whined
his existing OS was so blind
he'd do better to pirate
an OS that ran great
but found his hardware declined
Please don't steal Mac OS!
Really, that's way uncool.

Also, now you can insult George Bush through an email, but at a price.
On paying 20$ to www.insultthepresident.com, they'll forward your mail to the president of USA. You'll get an certificate for the insult and they'll also help you write one.

0 = 5

Attended GIR'2006 (Great Indian Rock) yesterday.

The line up was -

- Cassini's Division
- Medusa
- Demonic Ressurection
- Prestorika
- Zero
- Your Code Name is: Milo

I had great expectations from Cassini’s Division. Can say, they were OK, at least concept-wise. Playing a set of all self-composed songs, with strong influences from Alternate Rock and Nu Metal. But what they lacked was talent. The lead guitarist hardly played anything but rhythm, the vocals were cracking up, the drummer was ok. They really need some home work to do.

Next up was Medusa. Used a lot of electronic mixes to create that effect. But again the guitarist sucked and the vocals were not that good either.

Demonic Ressurection came and went doing the regular-

make a puking sound for 1 min -> flush it down -> shout for another 1 min*

No offence to people who like Death Metal, but you guys mistreat Punk in the same fashion :D

*The recipe for creating death metal songs comes to you courtesy – GD

Prestorika was the first band that evening which clicked. But, having won Campus Rock Idol ‘05, they were expected to play the way they did.

But, honestly, the only band for which I went was Zero. And, without any doubt, I can say that Zero did what all the rest put together couldn’t. They started with songs from their new album, trying to popularize the new stuff.

The new songs were not that bad, but how many time has it happened that you are listening a song for the first time and you start singing along. Maybe I’ll sing along the next time (after having listened to the CD 10-12 times)

Then came the old songs – Not my kind of girl, Christmas in July, Lucy (they have changed the name of this song), PSP 12” (still don’t know what the acronym stands for) and an excellent cover of Roxanne and Mr. Taliban (I hope I got the title correctly)

The last were Your Code Name is: Milo. They performed, courtesy The British Council. The sound was not that bad. Kind of stuff I like. But after all that head banging and mosh’ing, I was hardly able to stand on my feet.

So the second day of GIR’06 finished off with a chicken piece in my hands (so much for the Bird Flu scare in India) and one in the hands of Ketan (along with a strange piece of metal inside it).

Some pet peeves though –

- Where the hell are the punk rockers?
- Why is everyone playing Nu Metal / Rap Metal?
- Where the hell are guitarists, with those mind-blowing riffs?
- Why can’t we have a Zero-only concert?
- When will the people in my office start listening to rock?
- Why am I not a part of a band :( ?